| Now that the vacation season is more or less over, the following guide will explain why your holiday turned out the way it did. |
| Old world charm ........... | No bath |
| Tropical ..................... | Rainy |
| Majestic setting ........... | A long way from town |
| Options galore ............. | Nothing is included in the itinerary |
| Secluded hideaway ........ | Impossible to find or get to |
| Pre-registered rooms ...... | Already occupied |
| Explore on your own ....... | Pay for it yourself |
| No extra fees ............... | No extras |
| Nominal fee ................. | Outrageous charge |
| Standard..................... | Sub-standard |
| Deluxe ....................... | Standard |
| Superior ..................... | One free shower cap |
| All the amenities .......... | Two free shower caps |
| Plush ........................ | Top and bottom sheets |
| Gentle breezes ............ | Occasional Gale-force winds |
| Light and airy............... | No air conditioning |
| Picturesque ................ | Theme park nearby |
| Open bar ................. | Free ice cubes |
Thanks Zeynep Ersavci