After one day they'd demolished the crane, by pulling too hard when the ball got stuck!  I hope they get going again soon, because I'm just waiting for one of those black-windowed BMW 4WDs to ignore the red flags, and drive alongside the site when a chunk of concrete is coming down onto his bonnet.

HE WENT AND IT WAS WORTH IT!

Fairy tales do sometimes come true. 30-year-old golfer Scott Drummond had turned pro in 1996, but was hardly making enough from his winnings to cover his expenses. He was a Challenge Tour player who managed to get into a couple of main European Tour events each season, but had never shone. He had missed the last 6 cuts, and his winnings this year totalled £11,000. Nevertheless, in dogged pursuit of a breakthrough he mailed his entry for the prestigious Volvo PGA Championship at Wentworth, and received an acknowledgement pointing out that he was 4^th reserve. 

As luck would have it, 4 players did withdraw, allowing him to squeeze in. He then proceeded to tear up the famous course, and celebrated his birthday on Saturday in second place on the leaderboard. 

He thus started Sunday in the final group with Angel Cabrera. Did he crumble? Did he heck. His round of 64 and total of 19 under par both equalled tournament records, and he became only the second player in the history of the event to win at the first attempt (the other being a certain Arnold Palmer in 1975). A 2-stroke victory over a field containing Els, Singh and Clarke was no fluke, and he thoroughly deserved the £419,000 cheque that vaulted him into the top 100 of the world rankings. It was a fair bet that the attractive blonde lady who greeted him as he walked off the 18^th green (with the one-month-old baby girl in her arms) was his wife, but few watching had even noticed, let alone recognised the elderly gentleman with anorak and rucksack who gave him a quick hug just before that. It was his father, who had funded his attempts to make it as a pro, and he simply said, “You’ve made my life.”

No such dramas in America as David Toms cruised to a 6 shot win over a B-list field, but of more note was a great debut by ex-Ryder Cup captain Mark James in the US Seniors Tour. He tied for 4^th place against strong opposition. Good psychology for this year’s Cup!

“Everything worked fantastically for us, I worked hard to get a gap and just drove it home safely.” In these few words Michael Schumacher sums up yet another runaway win at Nurburgring, and shows that in addition to being the best racing driver in the world, he is also getting the hang of succinct journalism. The Ferrari outfit is a fantastic advert for total quality. Everything has to be absolutely right to give him the edge he’s got. No matter by how much or how little his pole time differs from his nearest challengers, when the race starts he simply rockets away and is able to lap about 2 seconds faster than anyone else, which then gives him the ability to ease off and drive no faster than necessary to maintain a comfortable cushion. No wonder his car never breaks down. Unfortunately though, it’s killing the championship as a spectacle!

The slightly surreal world of Exeter City football club continued with a home match against the 1994 Brazilian World Cup squad. This was a 90^th anniversary celebration of Exeter being the first professional club to tour Brazil, when the game was in its infancy there. How the tables have turned, as the global superstars helped out the English minnows in their fight for financial survival. Exeter dropped out of the League last season, and have struggled in the Conference, but at least their decline has resulted in a terminal lack of interest from Wacko Jacko, Uri Geller and Darth Vader, so they may now be able to concentrate on the matter at hand.

In the very real world, The Eagles have landed. No doubt a few pints of Pernod were sunk on Saturday night in northern France as Dave celebrated Crystal Palace’s promotion to the Premiership. Not bad for a team that had been in 19^th place in December.

Elsewhere in France there’s some tennis going on. At the time of writing ‘Come on’ Tim is still alive in the French Open, being the first Briton to reach the QF stage since the days of Roger Taylor. The French still have Mauresmo to cheer for, but it’s Latins and Russians who numerically dominate the latter rounds. Naturally the clothing sponsors have come up with efforts to be different this year, but of course Serena has to go it her own way, with a lurid lilac two-piece. She looks like a 2-scoop serving of strawberry and chocolate ice cream.

A wide-ranging selection of rugby stories this week.

Wasps made it a double season with a dour win against Bath, that added the Zurich Premiership trophy to the Heineken Cup they won in infinitely more exciting style the previous week.

Former England stalwart Jason Leonard marked his final Twickenham appearance with a score for the Barbarians against England, thus doubling his international try total!

One of Leonard’s World Cup winning colleagues is much younger and should be looking forward to many more years in the sport. However, his persistent shoulder injury is causing concern, and amongst the rumours doing the rounds is one that makes an ominous amount of sense. It is considered that a top kicker in the NFL American football league could earn $2 million per year, compared to Jonny’s reported £250,000 at Newcastle, and all he has to do is to sit on the bench until he is required to take a kick. No physical contact, and thus no potential threat to any weak joints. I don’t think the RFU can match that.

Quietly tucked away in a corner of the sports news page was a report of Scotland’s first tour match Down Under. They revealed the mountain they have to climb by succumbing 41-5 against Super 12 side Queensland Reds.

An IRB survey of rugby statistics reveals that the average match now lasts 90 minutes, and involves 10 replacements. No comment is made about underlying reasons, but does this suggest why Jonny may be on his way out??

And the Springbok Street soap storyline continues to throw up unlikely happenings such as the latest managing director resigning with a blatant attack on the SARFU president for being a liar.

Nasser did decide to quit cricket, bringing a strange mixture of favourable epitaphs and criticism for leaving the England squad in mid-season. Can’t win, can you?

Sri Lanka may be touring Australia without ace spinner Murali, who is debating whether to snub the hosts in protest against Prime Minister John Howard labelling him a ‘chucker’. If he does stay away, I should think the Aussies will be laughing out loud at the unexpected success of this little piece of gamesmanship, but they had little to cheer about in Zimbabwe, duly completing a meaningless rout of the depleted home side in the ODI series. The ICC will be debating Zimbabwe’s Test future later this month, but as the series against Australia was called off, and there’s not likely to be any progress in the selection wrangle in the near future, it’s difficult to see them sanctioning an unconditional continuation of the planned schedule.

Meanwhile the rebel players are looking for alternative employment and the favourite option seems to be the creation of a Zimbabwe Exiles side to play exhibition matches, much like the Barbarians rugby team. This is being brokered by the man behind the successful Lashings pub team in England, and thus looks a good bet.

And lastly our old pal Dalmiya is maintaining his profile with a thinly veiled threat against the forthcoming South African tour of India. He says he can’t guarantee that Gibbs and Boye would not face police questioning about outstanding allegations of match fixing during their 2000 tour. Well I guess if Howard can psyche out Murali, Dalmiya’s entitled to try and influence the selection of the visiting side.

ON THE LIGHTER SIDE

Gordon Strachan quit as Saints manager during last season, and said he was simply going to take a break from the game. Sure enough, there have been no reports of further employment, and he was spotted happily following the golf at Wentworth last weekend. However, thanks to Ken for reminding me that, like Ranieri (who has now indeed parted from Chelsea) he leaves a great legacy of interview quotes such as;

“You don't take losing lightly, do you Gordon?”

“I don't take stupid comments lightly either.”

and;

“So, Gordon, in what areas do you think Middlesbrough were better than you today?”

 “What areas? Mainly that big green one out there....”

Now that Nasser is no longer bound by ‘good behaviour/anti-slander’ clauses he has said what he really thought about the debacle of England’s World Cup in Zimbabwe last year;

"The whole Zimbabwe thing was a low for world cricket. I viewed the whole thing about the Zimbabwe issue as a complete schemozzle and one I don't think should be repeated."

Both Kimi Raikkonen and David Coulthard saw their under-performing McLarens blow up under them yet again at Nurburgring. The Finn was the first to go, and after getting a ride back to the pits he was chatting to his team on the pit wall. The camera then caught him waving to them as he walked towards the back of the garage, and James Allen commented;

“Kimi Raikkonen says goodbye to the team.”

How right he could be!

After Montoya ended teammate Ralf’s race with an unnecessarily desperate piece of driving at the first corner, Williams new Technical Director, Sam Michael said;

“It would help if our drivers didn’t keep crashing.”

I’m not sure what the connection is (if any) but I note that Anna Kournikova (who’s still described as a tennis star!) was the official starter at the single-handed Transat race in Plymouth yesterday. What with her reported marriage to singer Enrique Eglesias she’s not short of publicity.

Music makes the world go round, but not turbines. There is an annual concert held in the subterranean hall that houses one of Norway’s hydroelectric power stations. In preparation for this year’s event, the highly-strung pianist insisted on perfect tuning of his instrument, which required a complete shutdown of the generators to stop all vibration.

We had a bit of a ‘hairdryer’ day on Saturday this week. Nothing unusual, but nevertheless a bit unpleasant at 47 degrees C and 15% humidity. However, little did we realise, until we read the following day’s newspaper, just how damaging such weather can be. An American woman living in Dubai was quoted as saying;

“This weather is a massive shock. I just can’t wear make-up during the day.”

And in the same vein, from the ADCO Weekly Circular, an indication that not everybody out here is stinking rich. I mean, just look at the poverty in which some people live;

ON THE BOX  
(All live on Supersport; Abu Dhabi timings; GMT +4) 

Golf     Wales Open from Celtic Manor

Thu/Fri 18:00 – 21:00

Sat/Sun            17:00 – 20:00 

Golf     The Memorial Tournament from Muirfield village, Ohio

Thu/Fri             24:00

Saturday            23:00

Sunday              22:00

Motorbike racing            MotoGP from Mugello, Italy

Sunday              13:00           125cc
                        14:10            250cc
                        15:30            MotoGP

Cricket            England – New Zealand 2^nd Test from Headingley

Thursday to Monday daily from 13:45 – 21:15

Tennis             French Open

Tue/Wed            13:45 – 23:00
Thursday             15:45 – 23:00
Friday                 14:40 – 23:00
Saturday             16:45 – 19:00
Sunday                17:00 – 21:00

Athletics            IAAF Grand Prix

Saturday            19:30 – 23:00   from Sevilla
Tuesday (8^th)     21:30 – 00:30 from Ostrava, Czech Republic